Too much time together. Now I don’t want it to end. Anxiety-filled sleep. Cuddled up with my sweet girl. Beginning of the pandemic, still changing diapers. End of the pandemic, fully potty trained, sleepovers at Nana’s house. Hoping trying wanting another baby. Glad I could have wine in 2020. Impossible to think of a future in this country / on this planet for my girl. She gives me hope and something to work for. Exhausted, filled with joy, filled with dread, mentally taxed, mentally stifled, emotionally filled, the walls are closing in, I never want to leave. I used to be poetic, now I leave my writing in my notes app. I’m depleted but I’m more than I ever have been. I’m a mama during Covid.