michelle d.

Suffering from depression, PTSD, panic attacks, major anxiety — oh, and Lupus and Fibromyalgia — on a normal basis is a lot to handle. Then came 2020.

Stress is a major factor that affects Lupus — needless to say it’s been hell. I had my brain swabbed 7 times. 14-day quarantine with each of those — and the constant fear of knowing if I somehow got Covid, it most likely would kill me.

I finally hit my breaking point in October. I’ve often thought of suicide throughout my lifelong health and mental battles; however, I could never do that to my daughter. Then one October evening, even the love of my child wasn’t enough, and I actually swallowed a major concoction of pills. I just couldn’t fight anymore. The edge of the cliff had at last collapsed under my feet.

Then, as quick as the pills were affecting me … I shoved my fingers down my throat and waited for another day of standing on that edge.

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