terry b.

Our son and his girlfriend left college early due to the pandemic. They went through the process, but graduated almost three months early! They came to live with us, which doubled our bills and our cleaning efforts. It was frustrating that they didn’t meet our expectations to help, while playing the waiting game for apartment hunting and job seeking. It was getting to the point that it was damaging the relationship. I know they sensed the tension and resentment, but they are adults who happen to also be children.

The relationship really improved when they started working and making a contribution to the general needs of our home maintenance. It was tremendously challenging as a mom trying to navigate the new normal of raising adult kids to be more independent during the pandemic; we were empty nesters for a bit of time and enjoyed our privacy immensely. They lived with us for several months before setting off to their new apartment, and although they’ve made some missteps with the steep learning curve, I am incredibly proud and the relationship is healed. Apparently I’ve reached the “Mom was right, I don’t know what I don’t know and should ask for help and help reciprocate in turn” phase of parenting. We’re feeling liberated again as empty nesters; our bills have dropped by half, and I’m not cleaning up after four people instead of just two.

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